“But I don’t want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked.

“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat: “we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.”

“How do you know I’m mad?” said Alice.

“You must be,” said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.”

As we’ve grown older, Alice has grown darker. She started out as a prudent Victorian girl in the books, a timid little thing who acted more as a tabula rasa for the bizarre creatures in Wonderland to bounce absurdities off of than an active player in the craziness. Then she became a little more animated — literally. Now we know her as perhaps the wildest thing in the land of the macabre, whether she’s starring in twisted video games or going shoulder to shoulder with her twisted brethren to fight in wars for the very fate of Wonderland itself. It’s like the man once said: “Don’t get even — get mad.”

We don’t blame her for losing it. You can only stand so many boastful dodo birds, allegorical nonsense about carpenters and walruses, philosophizing ethereal felines, and Jabberwocks with eyes of flame whiffling through the tulgey woods who burble as they come until it gets to you. What else could she do but dump her frumpy dress for something a little more sinister and walk on the wild side? It’d be like being the only banana in the monkey house.

If you’re a mad woman in a mad world, Alice is your girl. Our Dark Alice Costume comes with Victorian-inspired dress, thigh highs, and glovelettes so you can drive them crazy right back. Or tell cute stories about pepperpots, we’re fine with that too. Just whatever you do be nice to strangers, get to bed at a reasonable hour, and remember to call your mom on her birthday. We don’t endorse total mania.